holiday gang bang : round 1
What happens when you get
15 Naked Ladies in one virtual room?
You get an incredible end of year Gang Bang.
We’re tackling the hard questions….
and the answers are surprising
Round 1: When it’s all said and done, if you had a daughter, would you want her to work in the business today?
LZ Hansen: I’ve always said that if my daughter were to become a prostitute I’d probably be fine with it. If I knew she could handle it like I did. It’s not for everyone & some strong fearless females have been chewed up spat out & pissed on. I guess luck has some thing to do with it. I’ve always had amazing luck. I closed my brothels in 2002 because the business had changed so much. Women were becoming more renegade, not part of the ‘family’ I had loved so back in the 1980s. I’d only really be comfortable if I knew she was safe, not strung out & not handing money to some maniac-pimp.
Lauri Shaw: Do you suppose Monica Lewinsky’s mother worried about sending her on that internship at the White House? Lewinsky ended up in the same boat as Ashley Dupre did a few years later… Dupre was a call girl, Lewinsky was somebody’s upper-middle-class daughter. The label “whore” can be slapped on anyone. If I had a daughter, it wouldn’t matter if she worked in a strip club or next to heads of state — she’d have as much dignity as I could possibly impart to her. And I would hope whatever she wanted to do would be fine with me.
Same time, I’d want to make sure she didn’t go in naive, the way I did. A lot of people hurt and took advantage of me because I didn’t know what I was doing. It’d be great if she had someone levelheaded to show her the ropes.
Georgina Spelvin: Honestly, no. It’s too dangerous and lonely.
Betty Dodson: Only if she was a high-end call girl and not abusing drugs. I would prefer she make her own money in her chosen profession.
Nina Hartley: No. It’s undergoing massive changes now and I don’t know if it will continue to be any source of steady work. Plus the stigma of being in porn is still pretty common. Easier in than out, and that’s not always a good thing. I’d like to think that I’d raise her to be grounded sexually but to keep it to herself and make her mark in the world.
Candida Royalle: No…Because I know that despite the fact that millions and millions view, rent, buy explicit movies, most people still look down on the women who perform in them. Even though I believe that there’s absolutely nothing wrong with women performing sexually for others to view and enjoy, as long as we live in a culture that insists on offering up only two visions of women – madonna, mother and good girl or whore, bad girl, a woman to be scorned and punished – women who choose to openly and publicly display their sexuality will forever have certain doors closed and opportunities denied. When we’re young we think it doesn’t matter, but as we get older we grow to understand the impact this can have not only on our lives, but on the lives of those we love…especially our children who will be forced to deal with possible ridicule as a result of our choices.
Kelly Hayworth: I think the word “want” is too strong for me, as it is not something I would necessarily wish for, but I wouldn’t be opposed to my daughter working in the sex industry. I think that it could be a positive thing for her: character building—it was for me. I have limits though; while I would hope that by the time my daughter was an adult she would be independent enough to do whatever she wants, I wouldn’t want her working on the streets, and ideally I’d hope that she had other plans for a future outside of the sex industry: something creative like in film or literature (perhaps these are my own wishes.)
I don’t think that’s hypocritical, because who doesn’t want their child to grow up to be something really amazing? I don’t know if anyone says “I really hope my daughter grows up to be an accountant,” you know?
Essence Alexander: If my daughter could not be talked out of it, I would tell her the caveat is that she has to have a clear exit plan. I would sit down with her and develop a 3-5 year business plan with measurable goals. I think about 3-5 years in she’d want out anyway. I’d also warn her of all the potential pitfalls: drugs, over spending, safety, etc.
Carol Queen: I have cats, not kids, BUT: I’d absolutely support any (adult) daughter of mine working in the sex industry, provided I felt she had enough knowledge to make the right choices about how and under what circumstances to work. I would want her to know other sex workers and have supportive, collegial relationships with them; I don’t think this is work to do alone, or as a loner. I’d want to make sure she knew she could (and in fact ought to) bring her brain with her to work, and only work where that’s respected.
Jodi Sh. Doff: You know, in a perfect world I’d say fine. The costumes, the lights, the glitter, the playing dress up and being the center of attention are all wonderful in theory. But theory is for classrooms. In the real world, people judge, media exploits and more than anything, as long as our laws continue not to support sex workers rights, as long as the work is stigmatized, it’s not safe work. No, not until things change and she can go to work knowing that if something happens, she can turn to the courts and the police and expect the same respect, attention and diligence as anyone else.
Tracy Quan: If I had a daughter? I’d want her to be a CPA. It’s the only occupation I can think of that seems safe enough for a child of mine to pursue. The business is just one of many industries that would scare the daylights out of me if it were my daughter. I could easily be one of those ultra-protective helicopter mums, because I know too much about what’s out there. I’m lucky I was never arrested and sometimes think I’m lucky to be alive! I don’t assume everyone else will be lucky. However, assertive daughters forge their own paths, and often go against their mothers. That’s the natural order of things.
Annie Sprinkle: It would depend on what my daughter was like. If the job suited her well, and it was what she really wanted to do, I would have no problem with it. Why should I? But I would want her to have a great guide/agent/mentor to educate her, keep her safe, and prosperous. I would hope that prostitution would be decriminalized by then, and thus a safer job. But then there are much more dangerous jobs than prostitute.
Melissa Petro: I wouldn’t encourage my daughter to be a sex worker. I wouldn’t discourage her either. Ultimately, every woman is free to choose how she makes herself sexually available, to whom, and for what in exchange– and we all do, all the time, sex worker and non-sex worker alike. If I were to have a daughter, hopefully I would parent her in such a way that she’d be prepared to make good choices. I wouldn’t want someone– especially someone I love– to make the same mistakes I did, but becoming a sex worker was not in and of itself a mistake, and I recognize that women have different experiences in the industry. Most important, I think, is to show love and practice acceptance no matter what choices someone makes.
Rachel Aimee: I wouldn’t have a problem with my daughter (or son, for that matter) working in strip clubs if I felt she was a sensible person who could take care of herself. It’s true that there are plenty of temptations in the clubs—to drink, do drugs, get carried away with trying to make as much money as possible and forget your other goals in life, etc.—but I also know from personal experience that it’s perfectly possible to just treat it as a job and have a functional and productive life outside of work. So I would only have a problem with my daughter being a stripper, or any kind of a sex worker, if I felt she was the kind of person who might get carried away with it and get into trouble—in which case I’d probably be worrying about her whatever she did!
Antonia Crane: If she was pursuing other goals then I’d want her to be a dancer. It makes financial sense. I believe that my daughter would have the common sense to make sound and sane decisions.
Next Wednesday: Round 2: How do you feel about your son or your brother being a client, customer or trick? What do you want him to know?
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